5 Insecurities EVERY Leader Wrestles With (And How to Overcome)

Insecurities have a weird way of revealing its ugly head. The consequences of insecurities damage relationships, can stifle calling, and limit potential. Here are five insecurities every leader wrestles with:

1. The Comparative Game

In most cases, leaders tend to compare themselves with other leaders, ministries, or organizations. This leads to a pessimistic look on themselves ("I will never measure up") or a elitism perspective ("I can do this better than you"). In any case, the comparative game hides itself in false humility or spiritual pride. 

2. The Competitive Game

Obviously, this leads to a competitive game. Our motivation for ministry is to be better or bigger. The motivation to serve our local contexts become a distant reality as we compete with the latest and greatest.

Unfortunately, this can become a "fad"... whatever is cool, hip, and "IN" is the best. The next generation of Church doesn't need to be a "fad"... please... people don't come to Christ because it was "cool"... they will easily find something else that is... 

3. Over-Critical and/or Judgemental

It is EASIER to be critical and judgemental than speak life into others. Why? Because being over-critical or judging others helps us feel better about ourselves. Insecurity FUELS our thoughts, words, and ultimately our actions towards criticism and judgementalism. Critical people FIND anything to judge and complain about. I would call this gossip. Simply put though, it is a constant CHOICE to CHOOSE to judge or speak life. It starts with a godly CHOICE.

4. Isolationism and/or Protectionism

Those who compare, compete, and judge will naturally isolate themselves to those who think the same they do. They become little tribes of their own rather than champion unity and diversity. Furthermore, these people start to have a protective perspective of their calling. 

This is a dangerous place to be because mentorship and accountability is not a reality. It becomes about whatever the isolated and protected person want. Unfortunately, life and ministry becomes what the individual thinks is best rather than what is best for those around the leader. This takes self-awareness.

5. Blame

Last, insecure leaders blame. They will blame their context, senior leader, circumstances, even God to shift responsibilities from themselves to whatever they blame. Blame is a self-defence knee jerk reaction... and consequently causes selfish leaders rather than self-aware leaders.

What do you wrestle with the most? Do you compare? compete? judge? isolate or protect out of fear of others doing better than yourself? and/or blame others rather than take responsibility? Honestly, we have ALL wrestled with the above YET not all are able to overcome insecurity. For me, here is the SECRET (which isn't meant to be a secret) to win over insecurity:

Know Who You Are and Who You Aren't (and be OK with it)

Obviously, this ties into your IDENTITY in Christ. Do you know who you are in Christ?

Furthermore, it is also assessing personality, gifts, wants, and needs. There are some GREAT tools for this; DISC, Birkman, Myers-Briggs (free), and Spiritual Gift inventory (free) test help assess who we are and who we aren't. I encourage you to check this out. 

In addition, have a group of TRUSTED friends and mentors that YOU CHOOSE and INTITATE with who are speaking into your life. Have them as guides to help you to know who you are and who you aren't. We all need people like this. In fact, DUCO has an Intentional Mentorship Journey that is committed to help leaders grow in their confidence, calling, character development, and competencies. This will help build security in a leader. To date, DUCO has trained over 30 leaders in this track. I encourage you to check it out.

Last, find what you are CREATED for and DO IT. Doing what you are created for on earth will give you confidence, affirm who you are and not, and confirm God's call on your life. 

IF we KNOW who we are and are comfortable in how HE created you and I, we can become better leaders. EVERYTHING else in life flows from this.

What else WINS over insecurity? Feel free to add to the conversation.